Guilty Pleasures

I woke up this morning, got both kids ready and headed out to the local YMCA for playschool. Thank goodness they offer a playschool so that I can get a workout while the kids are being looked after. Such a great start. Little Boy has playschool 3 days a week so little girl goes to the child minding and I work my butt off. It is absolutely the best thing for me mentally to get in that workout in the mornings, so I can burn stresses, anxieties, and frustration. The only thing is, lunch afterwards. I had such good intentions today. The plan was to take the kids to the grocery store, pick out a nice healthy lunch, so we didnt eat kraft dinner AGAIN, and go home and eat. Well, little girl was throwing a fit on the floor of the YMCA while we were waiting for little boy to be finished playschool. Screaming NO at the top of her lungs, thrashing her arms and legs when I tried to pick her up, and just being all out miserable. These are the thoughts of stressed out mama; Child for Sale, anyone, even for free, I will give her away! How do I look like a good mother without coming across as evil, mean, or too easy??? Come on!! People, I am so sick of not knowing what is the proper way of punishing kids these days. I do not want to spank. Sorry if I push buttons, but I dont. We even did a time out, which actually worked, mostly. I tried talking to an almost 2 year old, which quite frankly looks so silly I am sure to those around, because, I am trying to reason with a not even 2 year old. Doesnt usually work! I even resorted to the ignoring, which just annoys everyone around you, cause then they have to listen to your freak of a child. Anyway, finally little boy was done playschool and we raced out of there!! I put them both in the car and said, "who wants McDonalds"? Yes, like all of you mothers out there, I looked like the best mother in the world to my kids, but the GUILT set in!


We are bombarded with the images of fat america all the time! Hey, I am all for everyone getting healthier, obviously since I am at the gym all the time. I could very easily, well not easily, but I could get it for my kids and eat something healthy myself when I got home. The problem with that one is that I feel even guiltier doing it! Why should I be allowing my kids to put those greasy foods in their mouths, but I am too healthy for it. So, while looking at the menu, I picked the staple for the kids, chicken nugget kids meal, and decided to pick the most fatty item on the menu for myself, the Big Mac Meal. I know what you are thinking, I am thinking the same thing, yes, I erased the whole workout I did this morning so I wouldnt feel guilty. Now you probably are wondering why do I do this to myself or the kids. Its EASIER!!! We are surrounded by easy options and I havent gone grocery shopping recently, so I didnt really have any great options at home, and I just wanted to make the kids happy, quiet, and dang it, I am lazy!! It is hard to admit that sometimes, but I am a lazy mama!


I worry constantly about my physical image because we are also bombarded by pictures of hot famous or not famous MILF's! Even the women without kids that look like bombshells, make me want to workout constantly. Granted, I dont think Heidi Montag is a bombshell anymore with all that plastic surgery on her face, she just looks older, but I am jealous that I dont look like that sometimes. As much as I am going to make everyone very angry now, I am going for some plastic surgery to get rid of some nasty tummy issues after having kids and bringing the girls up a bit. Dr therapist thinks I have a tad bit of body dismorphic disorder because I am a bit obsessed about my body. Who wouldnt though. I have a hard time being completely happy with how my body has changed as I have aged and how it has changed after kids. Some think it is something we should accept because we are blessed with beautiful children, but to me, it isnt about them. I dont resent them one bit for how my body has changed, I adore my crazy kids, it just has to do with genetics that my skin isnt as elastic (as the plastic surgeon said). I am also hoping that I am doing this young enough so my daughter wont know for a long time and we can discuss at an older age, why I chose to do this. All girls have a natural tendency to hate something about their bodies, but I dont want to make this worse for her. That is my biggest worry about surgery. I have a great life, great kids, great husband, but sucky skin and saggy boobs. Whatever, I am going to fix it. These are some of my guilty pleasures, or soon to be guilty pleasures. I will be able to have sex with the lights on and not feel one bit self-conscious! I will let my husband have a good, pardon my french, motorboat and love it! haha I thank God in my prayers quite often that he made people smart enough to come up with, and master the skill of plastic surgeries. So, I am sure I have pissed some off with my words, and also wonder why I am getting plastic surgery when I eat Mcdonalds. Well, I am realistic, I cant give up those foods, I just try to not eat them all the time. I am going to try not to become the fat mama with really high boobs and a scar on her lower torso, from an unable to tell tummy tuck. Goals are good right?? Now I am off to my other guilty pleasure, watching Big Love